I find myself saying 'I'm so sorry to trouble you...' or 'if you could *just*' quite a lot when I'm asking obstetricians to do things. I'm not sure the male staff speak in this way, they're far more direct like 'I need this patient to have...' I wonder if we soften the things we say as women? In order to be seen as 'nice' and non-confrontational? Is this left over from when all Drs were men and all mws female? Should we work on this or am I being paranoid? x